Thursday, July 22, 2010

Seaside Heights - Southern Campus

Jersey Shore’s second season moves from Seaside Heights to Miami. This move is logical because it seems like every self-centered narcissist (LeBron James) or reality TV cast (Kardashian sisters) is going there these days. Fortunately for the cast of Jersey Shore, they seem to fit both criteria. So if Jersey Shore is going to be based in Miami isn't that kind of like how Kid Minneapolis fought out of Detroit?


The odds are against them for the second season being as good as the original. Rarely are sequels better than the first installment. Unless you count The Empire Strikes Back and the second time you got laid.


Watching the show takes me back to when I used to go to the Jersey Shore with my friend Mike. Sure we didn't work in a t-shirt store, live in a beach house, or walk around "putting people to sleep", but we did other things rebellious kids do...like driving 30 mph in a 25 zone. Seriously, it's 25 everywhere you go down there...and is strictly enforced!!


Gym-Tan-Laundry, or GTL, was their motto and they stuck to it what seemed like everyday. Keep in mind this was before the show became a hit so this was actually part of their daily routine. Notice how the letter W (work) is missing - no wonder these people ended up on a reality show. You know how certain professions like medicine bring out the best and the brightest? Well reality TV is just like that, except completely opposite.


The entire cast is returning for season two, even though they held out for more money. Not sure if this was a real hold out or just a bluff. I mean what else were they going to if MTV said no, start a law firm? Even Angelina is back. I don't blame her for leaving season one since she left before the show was big and she had her reasons even though they were juvenile, but she was by far the worst character on the show. Think of how much Jersey Shore gained by her leaving. She didn’t like to party, and when she did she was a wet blanket. She wasn’t tan and I don’t remember her ever doing laundry. If you don’t GTL you’re not true NJ. Angelina’s leaving was like Dave Mustaine getting the boot from Metallica. Would they have invited him back after emerging as an iconic metal band? Not likely. This is one of many differences b/w Metallica and MTV, the main one being only one of them still plays music.


This season says there will be more drama than last season, which is promising because the cast had a false sense of confidence before they were celebrities. Now that they have some fame, the show’s potential for conflict only gets better. Apparently celebrities, especially ones with no discernible talent, are difficult to be around.


As a side note, the one place that doesn't need more drama is HBO - as in Johnny Drama. Read the tea leaves Bill Nelson and cancel that waste of a half hour called Entourage because the Lucky Charms box misses Kevin Connolly and Jeremy Piven needs to be John Cusak's likable buddy again instead of the poster boy for hair plugs. In case you haven't seen Entourage in a while, this is what you missed. Every. Single. Week.


Back to Jersey Shore. It starts next week and really couldn't come at a better time. 30 Rock and Modern Family are in re-runs and I'm getting tired of watching my beloved Orioles lose night after night. Not to mention the NFL is still 6 weeks away.


I can think of no better way to pass the time than by watching a show whose first season taught me a very valuable lesson - instead of studying and trying to make something of myself when I was a kid all I really needed to succeed was to do sit-ups and generously apply hair gel.

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